Man was created weak!

My dear brothers, just remember that when you’re engaged to a Muslimah, she’s still Harām for you. Like subhānAllāh, all of us have weakness when it comes to the opposite gender, as Allāh said “And man was created weak”, i.e. In the presence of women (as mentioned by the Mufassîreen), and the Prophet(صلى الله عليه وسلم) said that women are the biggest Fitna for Men.
But Ya’nī some of the things I’m hearing from brothers after the engagement, is that he calls her and says “Believe me, deep down I really love you” 😳 Akhī, what do you mean that you love her? Have some Sabr brother, she’s still a non-Mahram to you. 
Speaking on the phone with her is a big NO, this is where Shaytān comes right in-between you and stirs desires, and they even end up going out together and speaking with each other, he says “My Fiancé”, SubhānAllāh may Allāh protect us from ignorance.
Speaking alone with a non-Mahram woman is Harām, and this also includes speaking on the phone, because Shaytān is the 3rd person, and he can drift the conversation into something smooth and lovely wal-‘Iyāthubillāh, and soft speech which would place sickness in the other person’s heart, the guy will start telling her “I love you”, and “I will die for you” and Allāhu a’lam what else, so we must take this matter very seriously. The reason being is because this is sinning, and sins will take away the Barakah (blessings) of your marriage, and I’m sure none of you want that, may Allāh reward you.
Some Shaykhs recommend taking her (family) home number, so he can call her father or brother, talk to them with respect, tell them that you’re excited to meet them and get to know them, and then you can politely ask “Can I speak with the أخت (sister) in your presence”, and that way, you’re safe-guarding yourself from any evil thoughts, and no soft words would be used Inshā’Allāh.
Shaykh Nāsir al-Fahad(حفظه الله) has answered several questions in his Fatāwah of Ādāb on this topic, which also deal with speaking with a sister online, and that a man must fear Allāh, and avoid falling into deviation, especially since they can catch emotions and love for one another.
May Allāh keep our young boys and girls away from Harām and grant them Halāl spouses who truly deserve them, striving to please Allāh(سبحانه وتعالى) together while changing for the better.


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